Anonymous asked: Hi, you're just really pretty and I wanted to lt you know! Sorry if this is out of the blue, I just sqw your selfie uwu
Thank chu so much, darling. (:
Jessica Jane is back! Awh yeah.
1) Acceptance is Key
Hi, there. My name is Francisco or at least, it used to be until I learned who I really was. My name is now Jessica and I was born in the wrong body. For as long as I could remember I always knew who I was, but I was afraid to show it or even ask about it. I kept it as my burden for many, many years to come. As a child I was always different. I used to try to keep away from boys and their ways (sports, getting down and dirty, etc.) and I always gazed at girls from afar, glanzing at their majestic beauty. I always knew that I should’ve been one of them, that God had made a mistake by putting me in the body of a biological male. I knew something was wrong and I wanted to fix it. I came to the final conclusion that I was infact a girl at the age of fourteen, but I didn’t even speak about it until four years later. This is where things got messy. My mom’s reaction to me telling her was just…appalling. She ranted, she shouted and made me break down into tears. As for my dad, well…he was indifferent about it. From this moment on I knew that this would be the beginning of a whole new life for me. My life as a trans* woman.
2) Finding My Place
I had stopped dating two years before I came out as transgender. I had seen a few people, but it was never something serious. I felt trapped. I felt alone. Nobody really wanted to understand me. Due to this being the current state at that time, I had taken measures into my own hands. I contacted a Gender Therapist from Bayamon, so she’d help me start my transition. This would not be the case. I told my mom about it and she refused to let me go there or see any Gender Therapists. I had nowhere to look. So, I looked at one option that I hadn’t looked at in a while…suicide. I tried cutting my veins once more after countless attempts, but I stopped and broke down on the floor, sobbing at each second that I passed on this earth as a girl trapped in a boy’s body. This was not the answer, though. I found a wig I had bought for a reenactment costume I used about 5 years ago and wore it once more. I looked in the mirror and smiled as I thought -“I am one step closer in becoming me.”- Then as I took it off I remembered it was just a wig, I still had normal flippy, kind of long, boyish hair. I still looked too much like a boy to ever pass a girl in public. That’s when the summer ended. I started my first year in college and I started meeting new people. One of these is my girlfriend, Andrea. She’s been completely supportive after I told her about all of this. She’s been amazing through this process. I’m also going to meet the head of a transsexual women organization near my campus. She told me she’s going to help me out a lot through my transition. Things are starting to look up.